Some More Things That Are Not Actually Normal But Seem Sort of Normal After 3.01 Years in New York CIty

The person in the apartment across the courtyard from yours whose radio alarm goes off at seven in the morning during the summertime and plays at such a volume for forty-five minutes to an hour that you can hear it in your apartment as if you have the radio turned up very loudly in the next room, and this only occurs at random so that for weeks or even months it will not happen, but there were two solid weeks the first summer you lived in New York where that radio played "Poker Face" at 7:15 a.m. and you thought you would lose your mind, and you have never been able to figure out which apartment it is so that even if you were able to get hold of an air rifle or some type of grenade-launching apparatus it would be of no use to you, and the radio came on for the first time this year just now and someone started screaming "Turn off your fucking radio! Turn it off" out their window and you thought "Oh, they must be new in the neighborhood."

The fact that you would rather stand ankle-deep in water every time you take a shower than interact with the landlady long enough to tell her there is a problem with the drain.

The fact that your friend is coming to visit this weekend and you wonder if you should tell your landlady so that she doesn't lock the friend out of the building, which she did the last time the friend came to visit, because she dislikes the aspect of this particular friend.

Fashion week.

The Famous Hipster Jewelry Designer who lives near you and stares at you in an extremely bewildered manner every time she crosses your path, which is often, so that just seeing her coming you want to shout WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT NO SERIOUSLY. SERIOUSLY.

The elderly Polish indigent gentleman who lurches up and down your street screaming invective, and who was extremely hostile to you for some time, and then one morning you passed him where he was sitting on a stoop singing very loudly in Polish, and he offered his pint of vodka to you in a friendly manner, and you thought, "At last, I have arrived."