1. Commenced labor upon our Memoirs; which mostly involved rereading the journals of our adolescence, weeping with mortification, and subsequently looking up the Many Loves of the Young Rejectionist on Facebook. They are none of them quite so glamourous as we remember. We would be GREATLY AIDED in the production of said Memoirs if any one of you beloved Author-friends might be able to provide us with 1. a copy of the 1993 Perry Farrell/Casey Niccoli film Gift, which had a profound effect on our development as a young person 2. all back issues of Sassy magazine, 1988-1994. In return we can provide you with an autographed copy of our Memoirs upon their eventual (hypothetical) publication, also our Undying Gratitude, which is worth its weight in gold, for serious.
2. Walked homeless doggies with our beloved Chérie l'Ecrivain and discussed seminal 1994 Blake Nelson novel Girl, which figured significantly in the adolescences of both Chérie and Le R., further cementing our psychic twinhood. Homeless doggies had to be returned to shelter early, due to unfortunate and unsightly parasite-related issues (of homeless doggies, not Chérie or Le R.).
3. Strategized our Fall Fashions, which center, not coincidentally, around the theme "1994," and will involve the addition of crushed velvet and many thermal items to our stylistic oeuvre. Wore knee-high boots, rejoiced, BECAUSE IT IS NO LONGER A THOUSAND DEGREES. Also, we DO complain a lot, that is totally true, BUT it WAS the HOTTEST SUMMER EVER RECORDED IN THE HISTORY OF NEW YORK. So it wasn't just us.
4. Read all those funny things going around the tinterweb at the moment on the perils of dating writers. Tee hee. But seriously, Author-friends, should you be so fortunate as to have a Support Team of your own, why don't you go and give that person a little hug? Because if OUR Support Team had a job description, it would read something like "Must be handsome and charming, must make appropriate soothing noises in times of Rejectionist emotional duress, must be willing to poach eggs perfectly at odd hours/make flawless crepes upon demand/provide infusions of bourbon as needed, also needs to be all like 'Of course!' when Rejectionist demands construction of YET ANOTHER website, also must drop own projects at moment's notice in order to show Rejectionist how to transpose heads with photoshop/make giant document in indesign/solder jump rings with alcohol lamp, also should know how to cook hamburgers so they are charred on the outside and almost raw in the middle, also must be supportive every time Rejectionist comes home ranting about various injustices which is pretty much every five minutes, also must not roll eyes when Rejectionist is all like 'and then THIS stupid thing happened on the Internet,' also must be willing to stay up until 4am repainting the bathroom the night before Rejectionist Mère comes to visit, also has to drive the Zipcar because Rejectionist has developed inexplicable and incapacitating phobia of driving in recent years. Position is unsalaried and entirely without benefits, although Rejectionist can be sort of endearing when fed and well-rested, but in general, she is a holy terror." Which is to say, if there is anyone on this earth who deserves a lot of gratitude, it is our Support Team. HUZZAH SUPPORT TEAM.
5. It is quite tiring commencing labor upon one's Memoirs and strategizing one's fashions, so we were sure to have a lot of snacks.