For When People Don't Get Your Totally Hilarious Gordon Lish Jokes
Friday, May 28, 2010
It's a holiday weekend! Maybe we will make up our own novel cover! Read an awesome essay that has nothing to do with publishing! Play a SWEET VALLEY HIGH DRINKING GAME YES REALLY! Or maybe we will have too many whiskies and send the STEPHENIE MEYER ENGAGEMENT RING TO ONE OF OUR LUCKY FIANCÉ/ES YOU KNOW WHO'S FIRST ON THE LIST ERIC!!!!!! You're welcome.
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i'm prepared to fight Eric for that engagement ring.
you made me promises.
Oh! OH! I so wanna play the SVH drinking game. With SAKE!
I wonder if Francine Pascal is berating herself for not designing a Wakefield twins engagement ring. Or did they ever sell those lavlier necklaces?
Sorry to double post but. Y'all. You HAVE to click through to the Stephenie Meyer engagement ring link and read the comments. They are full of awesome. For example:
i cant wait for when justin beiber gives this ring to your sister, shes going to love it
Hey, I'm not average! I'm just unique different than you're unique! Some would call that...unique!
*grumble, grumble*
First and the greatest, Tahereh. First and the greatest.
Which, if I'm not mistaken, can be translated into Latin as Optimus Prime.
SECRET IDENTITY REVEALED
E
Optimus Prime? That's amazing.
I'm actually Megatron. Yes, I turn myself into a big plastic gun that kids bury in the sandbox and smear popsicle juice on.
It's tough being a villain these days.
I don't care who you marry as long as I get to be the matron of honor. Purrty pleez?
Sorry, I'm married. Please stop asking Lydia if you can have me.
Sorry, Lydia's married. Please stop asking me if you can have her.
I was just joking. I kind of typed that with a straight face. Don't want people getting mad.
And I say let Lydia be the matron of honor. Get her a sea foam green potato sack for a bridesmaid dress. Then I can remind her she asked for it.
I never take you seriously, Joe. I think it's the picture.
As a fiancée, I suppose it's nice to at least be nominated, even though I know I don't have a real chance.
OHHHH A TRANSFORMERS REFERENCE FTW!
Eric you are smooth.
but i still won't go down without a fight.
Le R and i shared a MOMENT! it may or may not have been when i held on too long as she hugged me goodbye, but that's, uh, not the point, exactly.
That SVH drinking game is now going to be the crown jewel of my weekend festivities. Just sayin'.
FIANCEES CAGEFIGHT
I USED UP ALL THE ACTIVITIES AT ONCE AND NOW THERE IS NOTHING LEFT TO DO THIS WEEKEND.
I will fight to the death to win your hand, Le R! BRING IT ON, YOU MOTHERRAINBOWS!!!!!
eat UNICORNS Keith Popely!
May you all wash away in a flood of skittles...
TRICERATOPHAT HAS WON THE STEPHENIE MEYER ENGAGEMENT RING but seriously we adore you all. HAPPY WEEK-END!!!!!
OMG EDWARD I WILL CHERISH IT FOREVER!!!
(Okay, I'm staging my own intervention. Author-friends, come tell me what writing merit badges you'd like me to draw. It might distract me long enough to keep me from subjecting you to anymore Photoshopped pictures.)
triceratophat is a worthy opponent.
big sigh.
Oh, she won't be so tough once tyrannosaurusrexharrison steals her hat...
Triceratophat is indeed a worthy opponent. I can only hope that Triceratophat will accept my suit with generosity. Yes, I am married already. But I have visited Utah. So I can claim Triceratophat for my fiancee, right?
I mean, in the right circles in Utah (and Appalachia and appparently parts of Arizona) the intended does not have to actually give consent. Right?
WVS: zonades- gonads that only apply in specific zones, like UT, AZ, and appalachia
Marriage freaks me out. But Sweet Valley High is f'ing awesome! I like the bitchy looking girl with the red hair..I always pretend I'm her when I play.
Just when Tahereh had successfully distracted me by asking for a special merit badge for Le R, Ink had to go and say that. STOP ENABLING ME, INK.
But everything's okay, because now that I am a double-fiancee I finally get what Twilight: New Moon was about and don't regret accidentally leaving the DVD several zipcodes away and the resulting library fine AT ALL.
Anything with Audrey Hepburn in it is okay by me.
I have all the Sweet Valley High books (so sad). I take a drink every time it's mentioned Elizabeth has a mole and that's how everyone tells them apart. I think the only time the author didn't mention it was in the last books after prom.
Hey, it would be great if you gave credit to where you found MY image. :)
(especially when it was from my flickr, in which downloading my images is disabled...)
Hi Tracey! Seriously got that image off, like, etsy or something? Definitely not off a flickr. But please email where to credit (rejectionistandyourmom[at]gmail.com) and will be happy to do so, or can just take it down if you'd rather. xxoo r.
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