Well! Dear Author-friends, look at that! it is very nearly the End of our Year! A year which has, in all honesty, been a smorgasbord of delights for our person, not least because it has brought us all of YOU. This little Rejectionist creature has taken on a life of her own, to the extent that we sometimes in times of difficulty ask ourself what the Rejectionist would do (show up to work drunk and in strange outfit, punch Enemy of the People on subway (after first making sure EoP was not our POPS HA HA HA OH POPS IT JUST NEVER GETS OLD!!!!), throw manuscript across room shouting WHAT IS THIS GARBAGE DO YOU PEOPLE FUCKING HATE ME, eat a puppy).
We are daily astounded and delighted and amazed and filled to the brim with joy and gratitude that all you divine people keep coming back here!!!! and you say such clever things!!! and legitimate industry professionals have been so kind to us!!! and for reals, are you SURE? has there not been some mistake, where you meant to read a blog that was, like, useful, and wearing sensible shoes, and not making smacking noises when it chews? and WTF, y'all, our job is GETTING PAID TO SIT IN THE SPINNY CHAIR AND READ ALL DAY. Who gets to do that? Seriously, how is that even a JOB? That's what we do for FUN. Even better, we get to work for an agent who is smart and funny and really really nice, we get to
hang out in bars with attend readings given by Real Writers who are "Steve's" fabulous, fabulous, insanely talented clients, AND we get to send people emails telling them their books are good, which never stops making us happy. Our job is possibly the best job ever, and believe us, we have had a whole lot of jobs, and know of which we speak.
With that, Author-friends, we are going to take a brief sabbatical from being the Rejectionist and return to the less exciting activity of being our own self from now until the New Year. No queries! No manuscripts! No witticisms of "Steve!" Just, you know, frolicking around New York, taking lots of naps, and possibly even giving some attention to our Novel, which has been sulking in a corner muttering sotto voce that we did not move to New York in order to talk about ourself on the internets all day. And when we return on January 4th you had better be READY, because 2010 is going to be the year we RAISE THE BAR OF AWESOME, and y'all had BETTER BE THERE WITH US.
Are you going to send us mediocre queries? NO YOU ARE NOT. Are you going to give up halfway through your book? NO YOU ARE NOT. Are you going to make us read anything that is less than ten-thousand-times-rewritten-until-it's-totally-perfect? NO YOU ARE NOT. Are you going to send us THE BEST BOOK EVER? YES YOU ARE! BRING IT! NOW GET TO WORK!!!!!